Agamenon: É bom Jair se assumindo!

O armário sempre foi um móvel emblemático e icônico na cultura brasileira. No armário, adúlteros se escondem dos cornos. Do armário saem os gays. Nos armários, também ficam as gavetas, onde se escondem objetos rombo-vibratórios e contratos misteriosos. Nos desvãos do armários, existem também os fundos falsos onde se guardam os falsos fundos e, principalmente, atrás do móvel é que se esconde a figura matreira e sinistra do Mário.

Mário? Que Mário? O Mario Sabino?

Ao curioso leitor que desconhece o Mário que se esconde atrás do móvel, não recomendo dar uma espiada no fundo do armário. Dói muito.

Para espanto de todos, o Brasil recebeu mais um aviso esdrúxulo do presidente Jair Bolsoarmário. Como se não fosse o bastante falar m*%#! erda todo dia, o presidanto comunicou à Nação que construiu um escritório dentro do closet no Palácio da Alvorada.

De agora em diante (e atrasante também), as reuniões ministeriais serão realizadas no closet presidencial, onde o presidente terá mais facilidade para encontrar um sapato e tacar na cabeça de quem discordar dele.

Dentro da furna cavernosa e abafada, entre meias furadas e cuecas usadas, Bolsonauro diz que se sente melhor para receber os seus auxiliares do círculo mais restrito.

Receber no “círculo mais restrito”? O que o presidente quer dizer com isso? Será que, de homofóbico militante, Bolsoneura transformou-se em gay confesso? Quer dizer, gay enrustido? Normalmente, os homoafetivos “saem do armário” para assumir, altaneiros e sem medo, a sua opção sexual.

Será que a “entrada no closet” é uma manobra política urdida (e ardida) pelo filho 02, o Carlicha? Será que essa “virada” de 180 graus tem a ver com o acordão feito com o Dias Toffoli para acabar com a Lava Jato?

Sempre desconfiei de que o Bolsoanalro, mais dia menos dia, iria acabar entrando no armário. É uma opção dele, ninguém tem nada a ver com isso. Mesmo porque quem critica esta atitude presidencial está sendo armáriofóbico.

Agora entendo por que o cineasta e ator Alegrande Frota foi expulso do PSL, Partido da Sodomia Liberal. Alexandre Froda nunca foi de se esconder no armário, faz questão de praticar a política em várias posições — de esquerda, de direita e de ladinho. E até mesmo por trás e na frente de todo mundo!

Agamenon Mendes Pedreira é jornalista e conhece o Mário de Andrade, o Mário Filho, o Mário Lúcio Vaz e o Mário Jorge Lobo Zagallo, o Zagallo.

Todo o poder a Toffoli. Leia aqui

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  1. SSeverino disse:

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  1. MMaria disse:

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  2. AAstrid disse:

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  3. PPaulo disse:

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  4. MMaria disse:

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  5. Célia disse:

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  6. Roberto disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  7. Paulo disse:

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  8. Eduardo disse:

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  9. André disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

    2. VGlsYXNjbywgY29udGludWEgdGVudGFuZG8gc2UgY29udmVuY2VyIGRpc3NvLi4uLg==

    3. TyBwcmVzaWRlbnRlIG7jbyDpIG9uaXBvdGVudGUsIHRlbSBhbGFyZGVhZG8gcXVlIOkgdW0gZGVtb2NyYXRhLOkgaG9uZXN0byBlIHRlbSBkaWZpY3VsZGFkZXMgcGFyYSBnb3Zlcm5hciwgb3MgcG9kZXJlcyBsZWdpc2xhdGl2byBlIGp1ZGljaeFyaW8gc+NvIHN1c3BlaXRvcyBlIHPzIGNyaWFtIG9ic3ThY3Vsb3MuIEZhemVyIG8gcXVl

  10. André disse:

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    2. Qm96byB0YW1i6W0gZOEgdW0gYmVpam8gaW5zYW5vIG5vIFRvZmZvbGkgcGFyYSBzZSBzYWx2YXIsIGFmdW5kYXIgYSBMYXZhIEphdG8gZSB0aXJhciBkYSBjYWRlaWEgdG9kb3Mgb3MgbHVsaXN0YXMgcXVlIG1hdGFtLCByb3ViYW0sIGludmFkZW0sIGRpZmFtYW0sIGRldmFzc2FtIGUgbWVudGVtLg==

    3. Qm96byBlaCB1bSBwYWxoYedvIHF1ZSBmYXogYXMgcGVzc29hcyBhbGVncmVzIGUgbHVsaXN0YXMgbWF0YW0sIHJvdWJhbSwgaW52YWRlbSwgZGlmYW1hbSBkZXZhc3NhbSAsIG1lbnRlbSAuIA==

    4. TyBCb20gcGFyYSBFc3F1ZXJkYWxoYXMsIOkgc2FpciBkbyBBcm3hcmlvLg==

  11. Paiva disse:

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  12. Marcia disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

    2. QXZpc291IG8gcXVlPz8/IFF1ZSBvIFBh7XMgZXN0YXZhIG5hIGRlcnJvY2FkYT8/Pz8/Pz8/Pz8/Pz8/Pz8/

  13. Juliana disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

    2. QmFpeG8gZSBuYXVzZWFudGUuIE1vc3RyYSBvIHF1YW50byBvIGJyYXNpbGVpcm8gcHJlY2lzYSBhcHJlbmRlciBub3ZhbWVudGUgYSByZXNwZWl0YXIgYXMgcGVzc29hcyBzZWphbSBlbGFzIHF1ZSBmb3JlbSAhISEgSXNzbyBlc3ThIHNlIHRvcm5hbmRvICJzZW5zbyBjb211bSIgLiBUcmlzdGUhISE=

    3. b2JyaWdhZG8gcG9yIHZvdGFyIG51bSBwcmVzaWRlbnRlIHF1ZSBmYXogYWNvcmRvIGNvbSAgbyB0b2Zmb2xpLi4gIHPzIHZjIG5hbyB2aXUgbyBsaXhvIGRlIHNlciBodW1hbm8gcXVlIGVsZSDJ

  14. Clovis disse:

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  15. O disse:

    TUVVIEPJUkVCUk8gZGVzY2V1IHBhcmEgbyBm7WdhZG8uLi4uZXN0b3UgcmFjaW9jaW5hbmRvIGV4YXRhbWVudGUgY29tbyBvIEFnYW1lbm9uLiBEZSB2b3RhbnRlIG1lIHRvcm5laSByZXZvbHRhbnRlLi4uIiBDcmlhbudhLCBu428gdmVy4XMgbmVuaHVtIHBhaXMgY29tbyBlc3RlISIgIE8gT2xhdm8sIChCaWxhYywgY2xhcm8gauEgZGVz

    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

    2. RXNzZSBjYXJhIGVoIG11aXRvIGNoYXRvICwgbuNvIHNlaSBwcSBkYWkgdW1hIGxpbmhhIHBhcmEgZWxlIHZvbWl0YXIg

  16. Paiva disse:

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  17. Sandra disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  18. Nórdica disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  19. John disse:

    Qm9sc29uYXJvIOkgdG9zY28sIHJpZO1jdWxvIGUgdGVtIHFpIGFiYWl4byBkYSBt6WRpYSBtYXMgcGVsbyBtZW5vcyBk4SBwcmEgcmlyLiBK4SBhIGVzcXVlcmRhIG7jbyB0ZW0gZ3Jh52EgbmVuaHVtYS4=

    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  20. Henry disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  21. Marcela disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  22. Montaigne disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  23. GILMAR disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  24. Gonçalo disse:

    VmVyZW1vcyBvIHF1ZSBCb2xzb25hcm8gdmFpIGZhemVyIGNvbSBvcyA4IHRlbWFzIGRlIHZldG9zIHN1Z2VyaWRvcyBwb3IgTW9ybyBubyBQTCBkZSBBYnVzbyBkZSBBdXRvcmlkYWRlLiBTZSBu428gYWNhdGFyIGVzc2VzIHZldG9zIGVsZSBlbnRyb3Ugbm8gYXJt4XJpbyBvbmRlIGrhIGVzdONvIFRvZmZvbGksIE1haWEgZSBBbGNvbHVtYnJlLg==

    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  25. Michael disse:

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    1. RSBBIE3NRElBIGltcHJlc3NhIGVtIENBTVBBTkhBIEVMRUlUT1JBTCBwYXJhIG8gQVJUSVNUQSBMdWNpYW5vIEh1bGsgZG8gamF0aW5obyBub3ZvIGNvbXByYWRvIGNvbSBkaW5oZWlybyBkbyBCTkRFUyBhIGp1cm9zIGRlIDMlYWEgSHVsayBJdGH6IEFuZHLpIEVzdGV2ZXMgQlRHIFBhY3R1YWwg

    2. RSBvIEEgTc1ESUEgaW1wcmVzc2EgZW0gQ0FNUEFOSEEgRUxFSVRPUkFMIHBhcmEgbyBBUlRJU1RBIEx1Y2lhbm8gSHVsayBkbyBqYXRpbmhvIG5vdm8gY29tcHJhZG8gY29tIGRpbmhlaXJvIGRvIEJOREVTIGEganVyb3MgZGUgMyVhYQ==

  26. Eduardo disse:

    Tm9zc2EhIFZpcm91IG1pZGEgbWFycm9tIG1lc21vLCBxdWFudGEgYm9iYWdlbSBlIGFmZXRh5+NvLiBRdWVtIGVzY3JldmV1IGVzc2Egc2FuZGljZSwgYWNobyBxdWUgZXN0YSBzaW0gcHJlY2lzYW5kbyBzYWlyIGRvIGFybeFyaW8uLi4gcHFwLg==

  27. Arlindo disse:

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    1. QWdhbWVub24gKGNvZC4pIHVzYXIgcGFsYXZyYXMgb2ZlbnNpdmFzIHBvZGUsIHFkbyB2YW1vcyByZXNwb25kZXIuLi4uIHPjbyBwYWxhdnJhcyBzZW5z7XZlaXM/IFZvY+ogICJIbWVub3IgIiB0b3Jub3Utc2UgdONvIG1lbm9yIGMvIGVzc2UgdGV4dG8gcSBtZSBjYXVzb3UgbuF1c2VhISEh

  28. Nyco disse:

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  29. Rubens disse:

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  30. Gustavo disse:

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  31. Vieiro disse:

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    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg

  32. Tilasco disse:

    TyBpbXBvcnRhbnRlIOkgbyBQcmVzIEJvbHNvbmFybyBu428gYWRlcmlyIOAgY29ycnVw5+NvLkdvdmVybmFyIHVtIHBh7XMgY29tbyBvIEJyYXNpbCxjb20gc2VyaWVkYWRlIGUgcHJvYmlkYWRlLG7jbyDpIGNvaXNhIGbhY2lsLiBCb2xzb25hcm8gZXN04SBubyBjYW1pbmhvIGNlcnRvIGEgZGVzcGVpdG8gZGUgdG9kYXMgYXMgYWR2ZQ==

    1. QW1pZ28gbyBwcmVzaWRlbnRlIHBlcmRldSBvIHJ1bW8gaW5mZWxpem1lbnRlLg==

  33. André disse:

    ySBwYXJhIHJlY2ViZXIgbyBUb2Zmb2xpLCBjbGFyby4=

    1. Q29ycmlnaW5kbzogTyBHUkFOREUgQUNPUkTDTy9Cb2xzb25hcm8gL1RvZmZvbGkgL0FsY29sdW1icmUgL01haWEvZUx1bGEgbyBGTMFWSU8g6SBQUkEgU09MVEFSIExVTEEhISEhISEhISEg